Introducing: Ask Sophie!

An exciting new column, updates on our next mini-class, and a reminder to enter in this month's Low Ken giveaway if you haven't already!

Who among us escaped the cruel grasp of the 2000s Fashion Magazine Style Advice column? Poor souls from across the globe writing in to their favorite publications asking some semi-anonymous person how to dress in a way that minimized their unruly bodies, made them more attractive for dating, less sexy at work, more acceptable and less disruptive and, of course, thinner.

I absolutely devoured them, internalizing all the rules and reminders of ways I simply should never step out of line or embarrass myself. Wool ankle pants and little black dresses and silhouettes to flatter and disguise every body. Even beloved figures like Tim Gunn and Stacy London, while warm and charming, delivered normative advice laced with undertones of classism, fatphobia, and misogyny.

As I got older and realized none of this was real or actually meant anything, I still found myself voyeuristically drawn to style advice columns. The inquiries sent in often reveal the same core question that people are struggling with when it comes to style, which is: How Do I Know If I Am Okay? And almost all the answers to that question tend to repackage the same problem-causing anxiety as a solution. "If you follow these strict rules I tell you, you might be okay."

Style Advice(TM) tends to center around the assumption that there is a correct way to do style and an incorrect way. And that your job as a person getting dressed is to guess correctly. This assumption has not just shaped the style advice we're given, but it's shaped the style questions we think to ask.

Is this right for me? Does this work? Is this flattering? Am I too old for this?

Questions that assume an outside audience will know whether you are okay or not. Questions that assume you, however, never hold the information necessary to decide for yourself what feels good.

I've tried to structure my work as a stylist by helping people build their personal style in ways that don't rely on rules or outside criticism or being flattering or correct. Essentially the anti-advice column approach to style. Instead of working with clients to figure out "what works" on them, I ask them the questions – or really, I ask them one question over and over and over again:

Do you like it?

That's it. Really. Because that's all that matters. How do YOU feel in your clothes? That is not something I can answer for you, and there is no particular way you should feel in anything. My job, after hammering in this new framework centered not around correctness but around preference, is then to help you figure out why. If you like something, what is going on from a stylistic standpoint that is making you like it? And if you don't like it, what's going on that's making you not like it? And in either case – what can we replicate, notice, change, adjust, or alter to get your outfits all feeling like things you like. How do we build up your stylistic vocabulary so that you feel like you have agency in actually executing your own preferences instead of only occasionally stumbling into something you like by accident?

But here's the thing....I still love a Style Advice column (although now most "columns" are just people on social media telling you how to minimize your broad shoulders). I am fascinated by them, and think there's something so human about turning to someone else for guidance, and something so vulnerable and generous about allowing others to see what your question is. So I wanted to try starting an Advice Column right her on Style School – but one that is rooted in the same ethos of subjectivity, inclusivity, and useful tools vs criticism, classism, and rules. I'm not totally sure what to call this column....right now I tentatively just have Ask Sophie but that's so boring!! So if you have a fun, cheesy idea for a name please tell me!!

If you have a burning style question, please reply to this newsletter with it (and if you're feeling cheeky, sign off with a classic Advice Column signature like "Sincerely, Stumped by Sweaters" or something like that). This can be a broad question like "how do I find good jeans?" or a specific one like "I'm going to my best friend's cousin's manicurist's wedding and the theme is black tie hot dog and what does that mean and what should I wear?!" Every 4-6 weeks I'll choose a few to answer here exclusively on Style School, doing my best to deliver answers that are both useful AND also don't lean on tired rules and norms.

I'm not sure if it's that it's truly just everyone's most feared topic or it's that we're coming up on autumn, but you guys very overwhelmingly wanted our next Style Mini Class to be about layering! So I'm going to start working on that and promise I'll have it to you within the actual Fall season and well before the worst of Winter!!

Lastly, I know a lot of you new faces to Style School are here because of our super exciting Low Ken Waisted Bag giveaway! All you have to do to enter is be an active Style School member (which you already are) and follow Low Ken on Instagram.

If you'd like to enter please reply to this newsletter/email if you haven't already (many of you have or have messaged me on IG – if so you are all set!). There are a lot of you here at Style School but not everyone would necessarily want this bag so I want to limit the entrants to people who are actually interested!! You have until September 30th to enter and I'll announce the winner on October 1st!